I don’t believe those commercials about how EVERYone is constantly talking about how much they love their Tempurpedics on Twitter. I slept on a Tempurpedic once and it was like sleeping on a giant sponge.

I don’t believe those commercials about how EVERYone is constantly talking about how much they love their Tempurpedics on Twitter. I slept on a Tempurpedic once and it was like sleeping on a giant sponge.

17 notes

No, but seriously. The commercials are the stuff of nightmares.

No, but seriously. The commercials are the stuff of nightmares.

7 notes

There are only 2 constants in this world: #1 - It really is 5 o’clock somewhere. #2 - A Law & Order marathon is taking place every moment of every day.

There are only 2 constants in this world: #1 - It really is 5 o’clock somewhere. #2 - A Law & Order marathon is taking place every moment of every day.

10 notes

Where’s a single lady gotta go to get guys in this city? Writer’s note: Props to Nickie for this one.

Where’s a single lady gotta go to get guys in this city?

Writer’s note: Props to Nickie for this one.

13 notes

Don’t call it “5 Napkin Burger” unless 5 f*ing napkins come standard with every burger.

Don’t call it “5 Napkin Burger” unless 5 f*ing napkins come standard with every burger.

22 notes

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