The single grossest feeling in the world.

The single grossest feeling in the world.

10 notes

Clearly I’d vote that the fat-skinny guy and I take the fat-fat guy given his high meat to muscle/bone ratio.

Clearly I’d vote that the fat-skinny guy and I take the fat-fat guy given his high meat to muscle/bone ratio.

3 notes

One of the many reasons I hate clothes shopping.

One of the many reasons I hate clothes shopping.

19 notes

I only like things when they’re vintage.

I only like things when they’re vintage.

19 notes

I tried to develop a taste for coffee. It didn’t really work out.

I tried to develop a taste for coffee. It didn’t really work out.

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Conversation I imagine at Time Warner Cable HQ: EVP #1: Don’t you think customers will get pissed that we just keep hiking up their cable bills even as the quality of our service declines at an exponential rate? I mean, what if they just all get sick of paying through the nose and resort to watching ALL their shows online for free? EVP #2: Hahaha, Frank, you are HI-LARIOUS! Everyone knows the Internet is just a fad. People would NEVER cancel their cable. It’s a goddamn institution!

Conversation I imagine at Time Warner Cable HQ:

EVP #1: Don’t you think customers will get pissed that we just keep hiking up their cable bills even as the quality of our service declines at an exponential rate? I mean, what if they just all get sick of paying through the nose and resort to watching ALL their shows online for free?

EVP #2: Hahaha, Frank, you are HI-LARIOUS! Everyone knows the Internet is just a fad. People would NEVER cancel their cable. It’s a goddamn institution!

7 notes

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